Saying Goodbye to Your Jeans—A New Perspective on Progress

I bought a new pair of jeans yesterday. For me, trying on jeans is right up there with going for a new bathing suit. No, not particularly positive. In fact, while I love fashion, shopping for clothes and shoes is never anything short of depressing. I can’t find my size shoes in stores (9 1/2 AAAA), and those in catalogues are often fashion failures. My shoulders are broad and my arms long, making well-fitting tops and jackets impossible to find. I’ll stop here; I think you get the idea.

I needed a new pair of jeans. Somehow, a few years ago, I had convinced myself to purchase a pricey pair of dressy jeans, and now I knew it was time to move on. Why? Because every time I put them on, while they looked fine, I was less than comfortable. Maybe knowing the phrase muffin topping had an impact—I just couldn’t get past that visual. And wearing them kept me from fully enjoying my dinners out and my socializing.

So I selected a new pair from a boutique with a limited but fabulous selection of clothes, and picked them (drum roll please) based on their fit and comfort. Yes, they were a size larger than my last designer-type jeans, in spite of my weight remaining the same over these years. And so I bought them.

Jeans were a topic raised in many patient sessions last week. (You thought I only talked about food, eating, calories, I suppose?) Marie, who has struggled with obesity and binge eating disorder for many years, reported her approach to moving on. She was ridding her closet of everything over size 20, as she now comfortably wears an 18, having lost, I forget exactly, but somewhere near 60 pounds (while enjoying such foods as cookies and bagels, I’ll add). The size 20s are really a just in case—I don’t think she truly trusts that her progress is for real, in spite of it being over a year and a half of consistent behavior change with resulting weight loss.

Even more notable was the message I received from Dana, describing the emotions of parting with her old jeans, her anorexic jeans, a remnant of her anorexic self. After discussing her decision to discard a stack of unhealthy-sized jeans, she followed up her session with this note, (excerpted with her permission, below):

“I must tell you that when I pulled down my street from my appt with you, the trash truck was at the house before mine... and as I pulled into my garage I watched in the car mirror the big claws grabbing the trash can to empty it into the truck.  My jeans.  I did it.  Lori, I totally did it.  I successfully threw them out.  I'm feeling so mixed about this enormous sudden decision to get rid of those jeans.  I'm so glad I told you I did this, as I originally wasn't going to tell anyone because to me it signifies weakness... I will never fit into those jeans again... I will never be as disciplined as I once was for so many years... I will FEEL now... there will be no more dismissing life... no living in a state of fog and numbing out... no more living passively...I must now be present in life. 

I didn't want to tell you (or anyone) about throwing away the jeans because I feel like I'm a failure and I'm giving up.  Logically I know this not to be true... but the emotional level is a whole other thing.

This feels a little overwhelming right now.  Never did I imagine it would stir this much emotion.  That pile of jeans symbolized so much - probably more than I can comprehend.  All these years (I guess of progress and agonizing work) it took me to build that pile.  The rejects.  What does it mean for me now? The only descriptive phrase I can come up with is sink or swim.  I made the decision to get rid of that pile of jeans that are unhealthy sizes for me.  This means I forfeited the chance to fit back into them, ever again, because they are no longer in my possession.”

“Right this minute I am in the midst of surrendering to better health at a bigger size.  I feel weak, but I also feel a pull to try.  The challenge is to learn how to accept this larger size as a new way of life...”

“I don't like the size I am, but then I was never happy with the size of those jeans I just threw to the garbage...”

“Just a lot of feelings around this.  You're right, maybe it is sort of like mourning…”

Wow. I am so impressed with her action, and her newfound ability to communicate her thoughts and feelings around this. In the past, these would have been masked with either binge eating or restriction. She couldn't have done it without the clarity that comes with nourishment, and, of course, with good counseling. 

 Clearly there’s much more to purging the jeans and buying a new pair. It’s about accepting change, and believing that it’s okay. It’s about trust, that you really have progressed, and you can continue to stay the course. And it’s about getting comfortable, physically—choosing sizes and styles that are appropriate, allowing your self to simply feel good. Maybe it's time to clear out your old jeans.

Your thoughts?

Colonic Irrigation For Weight Loss?

Colonic irrigation may seem like a positive,
"relaxing"and necessary procedure but...

I’m okay with my weight, and with my body. Most days, that is. But what if I opened my email to find a Groupon that lured me with the promise of feeling better, of losing weight, of being cleaner, healthier? And what if I passed on it the first time, simply ignored it, but received it again, when I wasn’t in my best place? And what if I didn’t have the wisdom to know how I was being played with, manipulated, misinformed, for them to make a buck off me?

I ignored the promise of a cleaner colon and all of its wonders.

That was the first time. This time, particularly after inspiration from Carrie’s post at E-D Bites, I needed to post my rebuttal.

Won’t Colonic Irrigation (and laxatives, and diet pills) solve the obesity epidemic?

Here’s what the Groupon promised:

• Colon hydrotherapy gently purges digestive tract of debris & toxins to ease chronic pain & restore organ function
• May kick-start weight loss
• Noninvasive and relaxing treatment
• Purges body of impacted debris and toxins
• Can boost organ function and relieve pain

And the facts?

From Medicare:

“Colonic irrigation is a procedure to wash out or lavage material on the walls of the bowel to an unlimited distance without inducing defecation.  This procedure is distinguished from all types of enemas, which are primarily used to induce defecation. There are no conditions for which colonic irrigation is medically indicated and no evidence of therapeutic value.” Given its uselessness, it is not a covered service. Bummer.

From the Cleveland Clinic 

“While the idea of ridding one’s body of built-up toxins from sugar, alcohol, caffeine and meat is appealing, the truth is that the data supporting colonic cleansing and body “detoxification” have not been studied sufficiently in clinical trials.

Carol Burke, MD, Director of the Center for Colon Polyp and Cancer Prevention in Cleveland Clinic’s Digestive Disease Institute, warns of the hazards and lack of evidence to support these therapies. “There is no evidence to support their benefit; there is only evidence of their complications,” adding that complications may include rectal perforations from colonic irrigation and enema therapy, oftentimes requiring surgery.”

From Medial News Today: 

“Twenty past studies about colon cleansing published over the last decade were analyzed by researchers, and found little evidence that the procedure offers any benefits. Instead, a number of the studies noted side effects such as cramping, bloating, vomiting, electrolyte imbalance and kidney failure.”

And really, calling the procedure relaxing and noninvasive? Do we need a visual here to remind us of what the process is? (Sorry, no photos this time).

My reaction might seem targeted to colonic irrigation. But really it’s about being taken advantage of—by the media, by those who ought to know better, and by our own vulnerability. Because products promising weight loss, laxatives and colonic irrigation lying about cleansing our weight away, only cause us damage. We so desperately want to believe, to hope that something will fix our ills, will improve our weight, will help us feel better about ourselves.

We’re bombarded everywhere by media messages—as well as comments from friends and strangers, directly and in overheard conversations—about their latest, their best diet ever. Their solution, found at last, if only for this week.

It comes from people you trust—like your chiropractor, whose hands of gold and makes you feel physically better with his adjustments, perhaps. For a significant contribution to his monthly income, he encourages outrageous products such as 3 day cleanses. 

Yup, several of my patients, including those struggling with bulimia have been victim to the transfer of trust—the belief in the provider who has been trustworthy in some arena of care—but who is damaging in others.

Angie believed she had multiple allergies. What she had was the start of an eating disorder that snowballed into severe restrictive eating and reliance on products her chiropractor sold her. In spite of unhealthy behaviors and food avoidance, she was sold a line of products that contributed to her belief that cleansing was the answer. Her health deteriorated, and by the time she presented to me I knew she needed a higher level of care. Seeing her chiropractor ultimately kept her from following up with her doctor, who might have had the wisdom to see the harm she was doing to herself.

It doesn’t help that we are manipulated at every turn about what is normal and realistic, regarding our appearance. I am not saying that the media causes eating disorders—merely that it influences how we see and feel about ourselves. As we age, skin wrinkles, and hair may gray. Trust me, I know. Weight may fluctuate, as does our level of activity and eating. If we compare ourselves to our younger selves, we may yearn to change. If we look to the photos in magazines and online of individuals our age, we are misguided into believing they are real. 

Please view this amazing video, which lets you in on the secret:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_vVUIYOmJM

Your Challenge

In this post New Year’s period, have you been challenged, triggered by the pull of diets or diet aids? I’d love to see your responses to the crazy messages you’re enduring. How did you twist it to avoid the pull? What did you say to yourself to come to your senses? Please share via the comments on this post!

And if you need help knowing what something isn’t a wise choice, ask in comments as well! Again, check out E-D Bites post for examples.

The Hyperbole of Weight Gain—The Problem With Relying On How You Feel.

Do you think she struggles with her size?

“We’ve got a big problem here”, she said, in a most unsettled way. “I’ve gained like 85 pounds”. I’m like a great heifer, no, a large female milking cow—whatever they are called”.  I am F-ing fat, and I can’t fit into my pants, and it’s not good. I’m eating, and now I’m hungry when I wasn’t before, and it feels like I just can’t stop.” Kara was able to sarcastically acknowledge that no, it wasn’t 85 pounds, but certainly 35 or so added pounds gained this one-week period between our sessions.  All while trying to increase her intake, to gain some weight gradually, following a period of weight loss from her already-too-low place.

Hyperbole, and then some, right?  Yet this true story from the past week speaks to a feeling, one that was anything but exaggerated. And I write this to point out how feelings could lead us astray in our attempt to get healthy. Kara’s session was not unlike others I’ve had in my career—in this past few weeks, even—counseling patients struggling with eating disorders and disordered eating.

Following the outburst, I acknowledged that her feeling like she had gained a million (or 35) pounds was real. Yes, it feels different, eating more than her abysmally inadequate diet of past weeks. Her food choices—lots of high fiber whole grains, fruits and vegetables—make it all the more challenging. Their large volume and relatively few calories don’t fit with a need to increase calories. Yet she feels as if she’s eating a lot, too much, in fact.  Oh, and the large coffees throughout the day didn’t help, either.

What’s worse is that once she started to eat more, she got hungrier. As is expected, metabolic rate, and along with it hunger, increases with an increase in food. So while metabolism slows with restriction, it picks back up with refueling. Research confirms it continues to increase (your metabolism, that is) until you hit a healthy weight range. (By the way, it’s also possible to be at a normal weight, eating pitifully little, resulting in a slowed metabolism. Increasing food, in this case, increases metabolic rate and weight may not increase, as calories increase along with metabolic rate.

But even if you know it, it feels scary having your hunger return. “What if it never stops increasing?” “Will I always be hungry, even though I’m trying to eat more?” “Will I ever be able to control my intake once I start eating more again?” The panic mounts.

Don't you just feel like staying this way sometimes?

If you respond to your hunger and honor it, it settles down—if you are eating enough. Sure, you’ll get hungry later—maybe 2 or 3 or 4 hours—and you’ll need to respond to that hunger as well. Otherwise, you may find yourself overeating, having restricted before. Until your signals start working for you, you may simply need to eat on a schedule—eating every few hours.

Back to Kara.

I weighed her. And she did gain weight. But it was only ¼ pound, to be exact. She assumed my scale was broken. I assumed she was serious, since that’s how she sounded. And what concerned me most, was my inability to reason with her in that moment; you can’t reason with someone who is irrational, who is simply responding to her feelings.

 It’s just like trying to reason with a young, underfed child; a malnourished individual is incapable of sensible decision-making and rational thought.

Somehow Kara came to her senses. Perhaps it helped being heard. Maybe the increased eating this week was a boost, allowing her to move from her stuck place, to hear the wisdom of my recommendations. And, finally trusting that rationally, she wasn’t having enough to eat, enough calories, to support her body’s needs.

Perhaps having me acknowledge how difficult, and scary, this whole process is, helped ground her in reality, helped. Rarely do providers describe the negatives of recovery, but I was honest with Kara and acknowledged that it sucks to have to feel.  Being numb—from restricting, binging, disconnecting, really works. It can be quite challenging to start to be present and to feel things you’d rather not be feeling.

Sometimes we really see ourselves
as distorted as this tape measure.

In past years, prior to more intensive treatment, there was no reasoning with her. It’s like a recent 24 year old male patient of mine who couldn’t get past his own food rules, and maintained his vigilance around raw foods, unprocessed foods low in fat, that never provided enough calories for his 6’2” frame. This bright young man was anything but reason-able, rational. That was all lost. It was all about how he felt. At that point, all I could do was recommend a higher level of care, to re-nourish him and restore his brain to allow him to think and act sensibly. Only then can we begin to successfully work together and move forward in recovery.

Last week a patient thanked me for letting her express her darkest, most disordered thoughts. After I listened, I rebutted. She had to hear my counter argument. She needed to see the pros and cons of her feelings—her feeling that she needed to drop some weight, in spite of being in the low end of a healthy weight range, in spite of the consequences on her body, her thinking, and her mood. She accepted my guidance, feeling liberated, and applied it in the days which followed. Because she was healthy enough, like Kara, she was able to come to her senses. Her thoughts helped change her feelings and subsequently her behaviors, and she is turning things around. Nice work!

If you are stuck on how bad your body feels, take a breath, and do a reality check. Is the change as major as it feels? And if so what are the benefits of eating more?  Being numb may feel safe, and change can be overwhelming, but what are the consequences of staying where you’re at, in your unhealthy place? With a supportive team and the right level of care, it’s not too late to move forward.

Beyond Glycemic Index and Radical Diets This New Year.

Besides amazing pastries, I do love their tag line!

"You guys eat a lot of pastries", she noted, commenting to my husband, her brother. Not a strange observation, I might add. After all, there were the baked goods from the gourmet shop, purchased Thursday, the croissants—chocolate, sweet-cheese topped with plum, and raspberry-filled, fresh from the St. Lawrence market, and finally the long awaited Dufflet Bakery Dacquoise. Oh, and as blogger NewMe can attest to, part of a slice of a disappointing layer cake on Friday afternoon, which my sister-in-law didn't even know about (until reading about it now, that is). 

I think we were a bit of a puzzle to her. We appeared the same sizes we had been last we saw her, about 5 or 6 years ago. Well, I’m projecting now. We are the same sizes we were then, although I can’t exactly say that’s how we appeared.

Like the rest of the world, she gives a fair amount of thought to food, eating and weight. Expression of guilt regarding her carbohydrate consumption combined with questions about glycemic index of sweets engaged me in conversation, and got me going. I do wonder if I will be invited back!

An endless assortment of breads and croissants--
and happy customers!

I corrected the misinformation that carbohydrate is the culprit in weight gain. As for glycemic index (GI), I shared that a food’s GI has rather limited value in weight control. Defined as the impact of a carbohydrate-containing food on blood sugar, as compared to a standard food (typically sugar or white bread), this value was designed as a tool for helping with blood sugar control. 

GI may impact one’s sense of fullness—generally less processed, higher fiber items have a lower GI and tend to help us feel more satisfied. Yet focusing on GI for weight management has its faults. If anything, taking into account the portion of carbohydrate, a calculation known as glycemic load (GL), would be a lot more useful. Otherwise, foods like carrots come out looking like items to be avoided—which would be quite idiotic, if you ask me.

But truthfully, the GI and GL are overrated for weight management. Why? Because we don’t eat foods the way they are evaluated in the lab, as single items, by themselves. Rather, we eat foods as part of mixed meals, which alters the impact on everything from blood sugar rise, to how quickly food empties from our gut, and our sense of fullness. Perhaps that's more than she, or you, cared to learn about glycemic index.

While staying with my sister-in-law and enjoying having her cook for me, I encouraged using less saturated fat than she would otherwise use. I recommended brushing the homemade blintzes with melted butter, then baking, as opposed to frying them in a pan with a more generous amount of fat. And she did. And everyone loved them. I suggested (only when prompted for my input) use of a non-stick pan for scrambling the eggs—topped with a quick shmear of butter for some flavor; combined with the sautéed onions, the reduced amount of fat in the pan was clearly not missed.

Among the many overwhelming sights at the
St. Lawrence Market, Toronto

I discouraged sweetening the fresh and ripe berry fruit salad—neither with sugar or Splenda—as it struck me as unnecessary.

As for those pastries I mentioned above? I had a sampling of the three croissants, amounting to one whole one, for my breakfast the next morning. Was I tempted to consume them, all three of them, while strolling around the market Saturday? Of course! But was I hungry then? Absolutely not! And I knew I’d enjoy them all the more when I was hungry, and not overwhelmed by the sights and distractions, so that I might savor them.

Our first night, when my sister-in-law served some pastries she selected for dessert, I just wasn’t hungry. After our fashionably late dinner, it was easy to pass them up. Of course I knew it wouldn’t be my last chance to enjoy such delectable items.

Am I treated like royalty or what?

Saturday night, however, I looked forward to, even longed for eating the hand-picked baked goods. Think macaron layers (meringue with ground nuts), filled with buttercream, flavored with hazelnut or cappuccino, covered with chocolate ganache, and topped with a French name I can't begin to appropriately pronounce. It met my expectation, as I vividly remembered these delights before their reincarnation from raspberry buttercream, 6 years back.

Admittedly, I worked out when visiting in Toronto, although I did less than my usual workouts, as we had other things on our agenda to accomplish. And Mica wasn’t there having to be walked.

And no, I don’t typically eat pastries with such frequency in the course of a week. But I can trust that it’s not my only chance to include these delights, so it’s easy to have just as much as I need, and only when I really care for them. 

Remember that carrot cake? Believe it or not, there are still a few pieces remaining in the freezer. Really.

 So don’t be pulled to extremes this time of year, lured by food rules, diets, and radical eating. The New Year shouldn’t mean the end of what you enjoy—be it high glycemic white breads, or great tasting pastries—but a new way of embracing what you truly desire, regardless of your weight. Just do so with respect for your hunger and your fullness, with the trust that it’s not your last chance to eat.

Struggling With Your Eating? Carrot Cake May Be The Answer.

I ate too much. I kid you not. Eight days filled with fried foods is weighing me down. And while I don’t celebrate Christmas, it happens to be my husband’s birthday. So I made the obligatory carrot cake with cream cheese frosting—his favorite—a total yum— and probably ate a bit more than was necessary. And that was after the Indian food we had out—shared lentil soup, appetizers—the works.

Having my jeans fit rather tightly can be challenging even if I needed to gain some weight—which I don’t. Somehow, there’s just no positive reinforcement in our culture for having your waist band cut into your flesh—even if it’s truly a sign of progress, of necessary weight gain for recovery. Growing out of your clothes (unless you’re an adolescent, entitling you to indulge in the newest fashions) yields little benefit in our society. But in my case, that’s beside the point. My personal goal is maintenance, within my normal and healthy weight.

Yes, even nutritionists can, and do, overeat at times. Of course I know better, yet I found myself grazing on salted, roasted cashews rather mindlessly while mixing up the carrot cake batter. And serving the cake from the table? Big mistake. It called to me, a mere arms-distance away. Those skinny, knife thin slivers don’t really count, do they?

What did I resolve when I woke up this morning? First, I wouldn’t dare consider weighing myself—no need to see what I already knew. I might have considered a bowl of bran flakes or oatmeal. But I really felt like having the freshly baked bread I made the night before. (I was rather productive on Christmas, wasn’t I?) 

Rather than have the cereal while yearning for the bread, I decided to have what I really wanted. And so I cut a thin slice of this rather dense, wholesome bread, chock full of oats and flax, figs and walnuts, seasoned with anise seed, and had a bowl of yogurt and fig jam to go with it. And, had my coffee, of course.

What I didn’t resolve was to make up for the extras consumed in the many days before. I did not resolve that I blew it, that I shouldn’t even bother, because it’s useless. Or, that the leftover carrot cake was to be trashed, so that I wouldn’t eat it again. I wouldn’t dream of such a thing (besides, my husband would probably fish it out of the trash barrel if I did). And if I did, it would only reinforce that cakes were something I wasn’t entitled to eat, so it was now or never when they were within my reach. This, of course, would only lead to overeating. I did, however, slice it up, wrapping each slice individually, and froze it.

I did not resolve to skip my usual workout, or my walks with Mica (you know who he is, by now, right?), because “why bother?” I love my treks through the woods by my home. It’s hard to know who gets more excited at the sight of a squirrel—me, or Mica.

Yes, it’s a process. We all need to remind ourselves of what is in place, rather than focusing on where we slipped. This morning’s Skype session with a client overseas addressed, in part, expectations. It came naturally to Anna to focus on the fact that her weight had not yet improved. But the positive changes she has been making were far less obvious to her, and certainly more difficult to measure. She needed to recall that having two chocolates, only two, was in fact, progress. Yes, there was a time, not too long ago, that she would have laughed when I suggested this was possible; chocolate was something to be avoided, when trying to manage weight, for fear that once she started she’d have no control over stopping.

Being able to distinguish her hunger—and her fullness—has also been a major recent achievement. Previously, without this awareness, she was left without the tools to self-regulate food intake. One night this week, she chose to have a snack, responding to this hunger, prior to dinner being ready. As a result, she was left with little hunger at mealtime. She gave herself permission to delay dinner—rather than eating it at the planned time—another step forward in listening to her body’s signals. She knew she could, and would, eat again later when she needed to. The fact is, as a result, she ended up being more in control of her eating, versus overeating.

But if the only goal is pounds lost, then she made no progress this past holiday week at all. Anna needed to revisit the house-building analogy, to shift her focus on what’s truly important at this stage of our work together. Building her foundation is a necessary first step to changing her relationship with food—and ultimately her weight.

As for me, I did have a lighter dinner this evening—a root vegetable soup, accompanied by the sliced homemade bread. And, I mindfully enjoyed every bite of the microwave-defrosted slice of carrot cake. 

And I’m feeling quite good.

PS: Here's the recipe some of you requested!

Joel's Birthday Carrot Cake

Ingredients

2 cups flour

2 cups sugar

2 tsps baking soda

2 tsps cinnamon

1/2 cup oil

1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce 

3 eggs

2 tsps vanilla extract

3 cups finely grated carrots

1 cup walnuts

1/2 cup shredded sweetened coconut

3/4 cup drained crushed pineapple

(See Cream Cheese Frosting Recipe below)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. 
Line 2 round cake pans with wax paper, then grease or spray them. (a  13 X 9 inch pan works fine too, but doesn't look as awesome!)

Blend the dry ingredients in a mixer.

Add the next ingredients, through vanilla, beating thoroughly.

Then fold in remaining ingredients.

Pour batter evenly into the two pans.

Place in middle rack of oven.

Bake approximately 1 hour, or until the edges pull off the sides or a toothpick comes out clean when inserted into the center of the cakes.

Let cake cool 10 minutes in the pans. Then flip them over onto plates or cake platter. They should fall from the pans with ease.

Peel off the wax paper and let cool an hour.

Cream Cheese Frosting

12 oz reduced fat cream cheese or Neufchatel (brick form), room temperature

4 Tbsps (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature

1 1/2 cups confectionary sugar

1 tsp vanilla extract

2 Tbsps milk

Blend it all until smooth, without lumps, and it's ready to use.

Frost one whole cake. Then drop the second cake onto the first and frost top and sides.

Sit down with a slice, and enjoy every bite. Remove the rest from the counter, by slicing and removing the pieces from view (freezing is ideal!)

This Holiday Of Miracles—Ancient Wisdom About Managing Your Eating

Taking back control. Rededication. Surviving persecution and abuse.  Triumph after being restricted, forbidden from following your own path. Your prized possession, quality olive oil, gets you through, for much longer than you ever believed it could.

These phrases describe the festival of Hanukkah, yet I can’t help but repackage them as a recipe for moving forward with our eating—both, during this holiday season and beyond, for Jews and non-Jews alike.

First, here’s my very brief summary of the holiday (for a more complete story, check out Chabad and Wikipedia). 

Hanukkah celebrates the rededication of the Second Temple in Jerusalem a long, long, time ago, more than 21 centuries ago. Following a rebellion against Hellenization, after being persecuted, denied following their own religion, a group of rebels fought back and regained control. They cleansed their temple, and wanted to light their 7-branched menorah, the candelabra, but there was only enough of the purified olive oil required for this ritual lighting to last one day. And yet, voila, it lasted all 8 days. This was great cause for celebration, and what better way than include a lot of fried food?

Some summarize our history more like this: They tried to kill us. They couldn’t. Let’s eat.

Thus, the tradition is to celebrate this triumph over oppression and the miracle of oil. And not just any foods, mind you. The Hanukkah mandate is eating oil rich foods, traditionally white carb types—it’s enough to cause panic among the health conscious and weight-focused.  We eat fried latkes (aka potato pancakes), with sufganiyot for dessert (aka doughnuts). And did I mention this lasts for not one night but for 8?

Regardless of your particular culture or religion, we are all confronted by food challenges this season. And while I have addressed this subject in various posts previously, http://dropitandeat.blogspot.com/2011/11/taking-charge-practical-strategies-for.html, http://dropitandeat.blogspot.com/2010/12/recovering-from-slip-coping-with.html, I thought I’d give a bit more support to get you through this challenging (yet potentially joyous) season.


Balance

From my own experience, I’ll tell you that eating latkes or similarly fried foods, as the main entrée, isn’t going to work for me. I have no problem with including oil in my diet (see http://bit.ly/dOZNqH  and http://bit.ly/uqnq92), but I need to have some balance. All too often, health-promoting types (nutritionists included) get stuck focusing on individual foods or nutrients, neglecting one important fact—we don’t eat single nutrients or food items. 


And we don’t need to get all nutrients from a single food! No, we eat foods together, providing us the opportunity to balance our meals, and our day’s intake, to stay healthy.

Take control of portions

Yes, Hanukkah at my house will include latkes, on more than one night. There will be the traditional potato and onion ones, and my more recent favorite—a parsnip-potato pancake. Perhaps I’ll even try a cardamom leek fritter recipe I stumbled upon recently. But served as the whole meal? I don’t think so. So what will I do? I’ll serve them with a soup and a salad, some lighter fare. On one night, I’ll also serve my homemade sufganiyot, these two-bite delights that really satisfy; at least the portions are small. The bottle of oil, in my home, lasts way more than eight nights, I’ll add. While the sufganiyot are deep fried, I’m light handed pouring oil for my latkes preparation.


Choose what you enjoy. Enjoy what you choose.

Wondering how you’ll manage the Christmas bird or roast with all the fixings, with a yule log for dessert, too? You, too, can add some balance, picking and choosing the richer and the less dense items. But do include foods you enjoy! Otherwise, you may find yourself indulging when you aren’t hungry later, making up for your feeling of deprivation.

And please don’t forget to leave leftovers! Better to enjoy the extra food when you aren’t stuffed; won’t the cake and pie taste better when you’re hungrier? Perhaps for breakfast the next morning? Yes, it’s allowed!

If you are doing the preparing, shopping and cooking for the holiday feast, remember that you have the right and the ability to dictate the meal content. Substitute some applesauce instead of the full amount of butter in the cake. Offer a range of your favorite vegetables to accompany the meal. Strain the fat off before mixing the gravy. Determine the ratio of desserts to guests—must it be one pie for every two people?

Be prepared.

Feeling overwhelmed? Preplan as much as you can. Make a shopping list; then send someone else to retrieve the foods. Bake in advance, and then freeze cookies and cakes. Sure, you may end up eating them right from the freezer, but wouldn’t they taste better eaten mindfully at room temperature?

Plan for the holiday eating schedule—be sure to eat breakfast in the morning, rather than letting one meal slide into the next. And don’t even think of restricting early in the day to compensate for potential overeating later. That, my friends, is a recipe for disaster.


Consider your limits.

And do watch your alcohol intake if you are trying to stay in control of your eating. Sure, it might decrease your stress, but it will also decrease your inhibitions around food (and, perhaps around those difficult relatives). That may be fine, if you are comfortable with the outcome. But it seems to me that rarely is the case.

I hope this helps limit the holiday stress.

Do enjoy the holidays, including your favorite foods!

Happy Holidays!

The Gifts You Brought Me: Priceless Progress This Holiday Season

Winter holidays are still several days away, but early gifts of gratitude have already shown up at my office. Yesterday’s were particularly sweet to me. Kay presented me with a lovely handcrafted pair of earrings, sold as a fundraiser for Project Have Hope. (Love that name!) 

Guess who knew there were some yummy cookies to uncover?

But I was even more touched by the additional part of her packaged gift, which Mica (canine to the left) unwrapped for me last night. Kay apparently recalled my familiarity with and love of her favorite cookies—Petite Ecolier. Yes, Kay could openly discuss how many chocolate covered French biscuits she consumes, and the pleasure they bring her. Gone are the cookies eaten in the closet—and the car, and in front of the computer screen.

I earned silver yesterday, but felt like I was the recipient of a gold; I loved the sterling earrings crafted by an Israeli artist that my patient knew I’d appreciate. But the even greater gift was my experience of our session. 171.5 pounds she has lost since we began our work together, from her presenting weight until now. 


No, that was not a typo. She started just below 400 pounds. There was no gastric bypass, in spite of the urging of her doctors. She has needed to decrease her diabetes medications as she has continued to progress. And after years of me patiently wearing her down, she is now exercising regularly. This was the most challenging piece to accomplish. Yes, she bought herself a new bathing suit for her water aerobics class she attends twice weekly. And she has been consistently walking a couple of time per week as well. It was quite the gift to behold all the progress she had made! You can read an old post on her: http://dropitandeat.blogspot.com/2011/02/maggies-152-lbs-weight-lossthis-time.html.

The other gifts were not intentionally timed with the holidays, nor were they intended for my benefit alone. There was Kate’s decision that life is worth fighting for, that her eating disorder needs to leave and that she needs to accept that a higher level of care is not a failure, but a move forward. Termination with some patients was also a gift—no, I wasn’t losing patience with them—it’s just that they were ready to move on—and I was so pleased to watch them fly.

Wishing you a peaceful road ahead.

Emails with thanks and appreciation for this blog arrived throughout the year— comments from Australia and British Columbia to France and Switzerland, from patients and fellow professionals as well as strangers—tales of a post, or a sentence, even, that made a difference, providing a sense of hope that wasn’t there before, a new perspective on their situation, a motivation to reach for something better than they have. Not all were positive and upbeat, that’s for certain. But having someone reach out for help, and appreciate that support I have given, is quite a gift.

These have been the greatest gifts I could ask for.

Coming up: More management strategies for this challenging, food-focused time of year. Look for it within the next couple of days.